Of Beginnings and Endings

          President Uchtdorf once said, "In light of what we know about our eternal destiny, is it any wonder that whenever we face the bitter endings of life, they seem unacceptable to us? There seems to be something inside of us that resists endings...endings are not our destiny."

          Yet so much of our mortal life is driven by what seems to us as the absolute termination of one phase of life or other.  We tend to look back longingly, somehow feeling that even if we were able to put all the pieces back just how they were, things would never again be the same.  In my experience, that is true.  The philosopher Heraclius said that “No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it's not the same river and he's not the same man.”  But for the child of God who lives the Gospel of Jesus Christ, the second time will be better than the first.

          Next Sunday I will go to the homecoming of one of my best friends from childhood.  Because of the way our missions overlapped, I haven't seen him in three years.  Those three years have been some of the most transformative years of my life, as I am sure they have been for him.  It will be a very different person who steps into the river this second time, but it will also be a better person.  For me our friendship is not determined by the identity or circumstance of either of us, but by the series of decisions I made a long time ago to bind my heart to his.  I don't expect things to be exactly the same as they were when we were kids, but for me they don't need to be.  In my opinion, some of the best things in life are unconditional.

          Our connection with another human being can be independent of our bond with any other person.  They can be stronger or weaker, but they can also be personal and individual.  Think of the Savior.  Is His love for you in any way diminished by His love for billions of others?

          Periods of life begin.  And then they end.  But some things continue on, growing brighter and brighter until the perfect day.  In my opinion, some of the most important things in life are eternal.

          Why do we dislike endings?  We dislike them because we love.  For me, that love is worth the price of painful separation because I know that most goodbyes do not last forever.  Because to love means to live, if you just replace the "i." Because happiness is not found in a perfect scantron or a fun hobby or a successful job, but in the consecration and sometimes sacrifice of those things for the people who matter most, for in reality mortal trivialities are but the spindles around which tapestries of everlasting fabric are woven.  The great love that casteth out all fear and never faileth is the power behind the Power who ended His pre-mortal existence one night in Bethlehem many centuries ago that He might descend below all things so that the plan of our salvation might begin.  That love is the light that penetrates the dark immensity of space, giving life and home to all things.  Yes, it is true,

In my opinion, the greatest things in life never end.

The Past, Present, and Future

            To be truly happy we need to be at peace with our past, our present and our future.  So often we think of our happiness as something that exists in the present.  We forget that we are spiritual offspring of a Being who dwells in an Eternal Now.  We underestimate the impact of both our past and future on our capacity to feel joy.

            We feel sad when a loved one passes away.  Why?  Because they aren't present with us?  Partially, but that isn't the whole story.  You don't see a husband sobbing at his bedside because his wife went to the store for a few minutes and isn't physically near his side.  No, we cry when loved ones die because we see before us a future that doesn't include the deceased person, at least for the short term.  However, just taking into account the present and future doesn't do justice to the situation either.  Every day on the news we hear stories of people dying in horrible ways, people who are also not physically with us and who we will not see for a great while either.  Why, then, do we mourn the passing of those closest to us so much more then the death of those that we do not know?  Because of the past.  Because of the years and years of memories that have woven our heart together with theirs.

            Take away any of these three perspectives and the sadness we feel at funerals would not exist.  Take away the past and we would be attending the last rites of a stranger.  Take away the pang of a future without our loved one and we are just a man waiting for his wife to come home from the store.  Take away their absence in the present and you have exactly what we have now:  an understanding that the people we love will die at some point, but that it isn't something to worry about until it happens.

            How about happiness?  At a marriage, the bride and groom are happy because the event 1) is a culmination of happy events of the past, 2) is the beginning of happy years (and hopefully even longer, if they are married in the temple) in the future, and 3) because the present moment ties into one and makes permanent the happiness of both past and future.

            Knowing this fact, that our past, present, and future all affect our overall frame of mind, we can change a lot about our lives.  For example, we can repent of our past sins so that our present companionship of the Holy Ghost and future eternal possibilities will not be limited.  We can change our perspective and understanding of the future by reading priesthood blessings we received long ago and by learning more about how God works in our lives through the whispering of the Spirit here and now, which will affect our interpretation of the past as well as our present attitudes.  We can take action today so that tomorrow we will feel better about how our yesterday went.

            Is it any wonder, then, that eternal life, the greatest happiness we can receive, is composed of a perfectly pure past, a present that is always in God's Presence, and an eternal future of constant progression with those that we love?  Through the timeless gift of Jesus Christ, whose Atonement reaches back endlessly to clean us from our mistakes and which sustains us each moment, the day may come that all that the Father has will be given to us.